I sold my car on Monday. I’ve been wanting to do that for years but kept coming up with excuses. Then I was stuck in a traffic jam after driving to meet a friend for a hike. The news reported that little balls of oil were washing onto the shores of Florida. I realized instantly that my “need” for a car to drive so that I could hike was part of the problem. A month or so later, I am without a car – having just finished my final voyage in my car.

It is interesting to observe what anxiety being car-free invokes in me. I didn’t really use my car that much (that’s part of the reason I wanted to sell it!). I mostly walk, take public transit, or carpool. But somehow, there it was: My car, the security blanket. Yesterday, I was panicking because I couldn’t imagine how I’d get the groceries home. After I calmed myself down, I found a simple solution. I bought one of those grocery carts at a hardware store. Duh!

Even before I sold my car, I often preferred to take public transit. Sure, it was a bit slower but I can read on the bus and didn’t have to worry about parking (or paying for it). It’s much less stressful to be driven than to drive when everybody thinks that they’re the only ones on the road. But I still had my security blanket. If I really needed to, I could use my car.

I am also noticing that I am giving up some control: The bus might be late, which means I might be late. I realized that I could not control that (it must have felt that the speed in which I travel by car was under my control, which as we know, it’s not really…). Relaxing into that release of control combined with a slower pace feels really good. I suspect that I will feel more secure, too, once I have gotten used to it. For now, I smile every time I remember that I don’t have to move my car from one side of the street to the other to avoid a ticket on cleaning days.

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