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That Marriage Thing — 4 Comments

  1. ……my point being: when we question the value of marriage, we question pretty much our entire civilization…………it’s taking on the super dragon…….’heavy’!!

    • That’s exactly what’s been happening to me! I started with questioning why *I* should be coupled, then realized it’s not just me (thanks to this book). So, I looked into the cultural connect and realized the normative pressure, which is so often missed. Once I’ve grasped that mechanism, I noticed that almost everything we consider “normal” in our “civilized” world stems from normative pressures. One of the key myths of civilization, as Daniel Quinn points out, is that there is only one right way to live. Thus, to be a “valuable adult,” we have to have a job (at least 40 hours per week), a car, a house, a spouse, 2.5 kids, etc. We should participate in shopping, always buying the newest gadgets. The kids have to learn the piano, play soccer, and do other extra-curricular activities. Etc. etc. etc. There’s little room for individuality, which is rather ironic because isn’t our society supposedly based on individuality?

      (It seems that the choice of reaction to this, once we realize it, is either sarcasm or despair because it seems so all encompassing, it’s hard to imagine how to break free… At least without huge sacrifices…)

  2. i have to resort to sarcasm, as i realize how long and hard we’ve been duped about the meaning, purpose and importance of marriage……..the list is endless: it’s the key to keeping men in power and women ‘in their place’….it’s the cheapest labor force without even revealing that it’s slavery……it’s the basis for ‘respectability’, especially for women (ha ha ha)….it’s ready-made instant sex for the husband……it’s ‘security’ for women (ho ho ho)…..it’s ‘legitimacy’ for kids……it’s the glue that keeps exploitative rulers in control of most of society…….

    shall we continue?…one more ‘benefit’: it provides a predictable, guaranteed place for everyone within the rigid, unquestioned hierarchy……….

    what’s not to to love??!! every girl gets to be ‘queen for a day’ with all the trappings, before she’s locked up for good……the ideal symbol of our superior civilization……the core nucleus of CIVILATION……bravo!

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