Singlism Promoted in Pop Culture
Last night I watched “I love you, Man” with a bunch of friends. Not something I usually do but with all the reading on the financial crisis I’ve been doing lately (especially this depressing piece), I needed a stupid comedy to cheer me up. I laughed a lot even as I was noting the singlism (the whole movie is pretty matrimanical since the plot revolves around the wedding of one of the main characters, Peter). Here are the two examples I remember (I didn’t exactly do a thorough analysis of the movie 😉 . Also the quotes aren’t necessarily verbatim…):
- The groom-to-be announces his engagement with words something like “Yes, I am getting married! I feel so grown up now!” Implication: You’re not grown up until you get married.
- One of the friends of the bride-to-be refocuses the conversation onto her a couple of times. Another friend comments about that (“Why do things always have to revolve around you?”). Prompting the first to shoot back “because I am single, that’s why.” Implication: Singles are selfish and self-centered.
- The friend of the groom-to-be is a bachelor, Sydney, and portrait as someone who’s pretty irresponsible – from not cleaning up after his dog to not working (though at the end, he’s turned into a successful investor). Implication: Singles don’t care about others and are irresponsible.
- One of my friends thought that Sydney appeared manic depressive. Not everybody in the car agreed but clearly there was something strange about him, something was wrong with him, therefore he remained single. Implication: There’s something wrong with you if you’re single. OR: If you’re single, you’ll be depressed most of the time.
Additionally, the movie suggests that men and women can really not be friends. Platonic friendships are not even considered. The only legitimate interaction between men & women is portrayed as sex.
If you watched the movie, feel free to share your reactions regarding the singlism or matrimania you notice in the movie. It would also be interesting to read reactions on possible homophobia and/or stereotype of gay men in the movie (lesbians don’t exist).
I see your point I think. My first response is “because people want to see it” but then I think that is your whole argument. Which makes total sense. I agree.
Although I think that everyone has their guilty pleasure. For example, I love watching NFL football and as a fan I get quite wound up. But I know logically the whole thing doesn’t mean anything. But I still like it. So from a personal level, I can’t very well criticize people who really like watching soaps. Or romantic movies. Neither of which I like.
I saw one romantic comedy in the last 5 years and it was “Ghost Town” with Ricky Gervais. I thought it was great but I’m a big Ricky Gervais fan. I thought it was funny. It didn’t really have marriage in it, just a dead spouse (the ghost) and I think a fiancee’ (who Ricky Gervais was able to beat out for the girl). But I they didn’t get married at the end so I am officially proclaiming this movie “non-marriage”.
Yes, but why do we have to have a dating movie? Why do we need to suggest that marriage should be the goal for all of us (unless we want to be forever immature)?
I’m not trying to be a dink but you are selectively picking pop culture that is geared toward dating people! It’s a date movie. The audience are young people who are either looking to date or looking to hang out and get laid.
I said it before – the TV show “Numbers” has like 5 singles on the show and they are all friends! You may be right, they might all get married, but for 4-5 seasons the characters on the show have pursued relationships and large friendships and not one of them has ever mentioned marriage ever. I’m just saying, not every movie is going to portray singles in the best light because it’s not a money maker! The Mentalist is similar. That show stars a single dude and also pretty much every cop on the squad that Simon Baker works with is single. Just trying to give some healthy alternatives!!