Love Flow — 1 Comment

  1. This is beautiful Rachel! It brought to mind my own discovery in a series of posts I refer to as Free to Be Single (excerpt from

    “I used to think that I needed someone to choose me in order to feel loved. I discovered this search left me feeling sad & unhappy as no guy ever did enough to make me feel loved (secure & safe) or they ended up not ‘choosing’ me which felt like the ultimate rejection. After many (too many to mention) of those experiences I learned I had been rejecting myself … I couldn’t feel loved since I didn’t love myself. That’s when I went within and began loving all the parts of me.”

    As I saw my words in black and white, I was struck by the notion of ‘choosing’ and ‘accepting’ myself. I’ve been doing this in the past few years yet I had never expressed it quite like this. Seeing it in this way caused a shift inside me, further dismantling the conversation I had for most of my adult life and was on display when I’d been so busy hooking up with people, breaking up and feeling not being chosen by them. The fact is this, as long as I put the choosing, accepting and loving in the hands of another, I was miserable. I had essentially given up responsibility for my happiness and joy to someone else. No other can choose me if I don’t choose me. No other can accept me if I don’t accept me. No other can love me if I don’t love me.

    The gift of this meandering journey to myself is this: by choosing and accepting myself, I have been present to the greatest love of all. As Oscar Wilde put it, “To love yourself is the beginning of a lifelong affair.”

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