In order to do more dragon taming, I am reading Windy Dryden’s book How to Accept Yourself, which is based on Rational Emotive Behavioral Therapy (REBT). He argues against self-esteem and suggests instead to work toward Unconditional Self-Acceptance (USA).
Dryden presents eleven principles of USA and suggests to copy those. So, I thought I’d share them. He gives more details on each principle in the book.
- As a human being you cannot legitimately be given a single rating, but parts of you can be rated, as can what happens to you.
- As a human being your essence is that you are fallible and unique.
- You are equal to other humans in terms of shared humanity, but unequal in many specific respects.
- When you accept yourself unconditionally, you think logically and avoid overgeneralization errors.
- Unconditional self-acceptance is closely linked with a flexible, preferential philosophy.
- When you accept yourself unconditionally, your emotions are healthy and your behavior is constructive.
- If you still want to rate yourself, judge yourself against conditions that do not change in your lifetime. Thus, think of yourself as worthwhile because you are human, alive, unique, and constantly changing.
- Unconditional self-acceptance promotes constructive action, not resignation.
- You can learn to accept yourself unconditionally (but never perfectly, nor for all time).
- Internalizing unconditional self-acceptance is difficult and involves hard work.
- Internalizing unconditional self-acceptance requires force and energy.
To learn more about REBT, please check out my section in healing tools.