I finally watched The Girl with the Dragon Tattoo. My reaction is mixed – between rejoicing at women fighting back against their abusers to being deeply disturbed and trying to avoid flashbacks. What would happen if all of us who have been deeply wounded through sexual abuse would fight back – maybe by withholding all sex in a twist on Lysistrata? Susan Brison has argued that rape and sexual abuse are not only crimes committed by individuals against individuals but they are group-based victimization (she presented this in a paper at the 2010 APA Pacific meeting). They reflect the general misogyny that is still very much a part of our reality. She suggests calling rape what it is: Gender-based violence without consent. There is nothing sexual about it. It is violence. And it is violence perpetrated (almost exclusively) by one gender onto another. The woman (she is not a girl! that is part of the disrespect that we women face!) with the dragon tattoo fights this violence with violence though she seems to get the connections. Women are the victims. Men are the perpetrators. But it is still certain twisted men who in some ways were also victims that perpetrate the crimes. It is not a reflection of our patriarchal society. It is the act of individuals. Until this view changes, we are not understanding rape as a reflection of the general anti-women messages. Until this view changes, we are not understanding rape as gender-based violence. Until this view changes, men and women are not equal.