Shame is the tool of the oppressors

It does not change our behavior. Guilt does. Shame is used to get people to oppress themselves. This is also why we cannot shame up the hierarchy. White men in power literally feel no shame because they are on top of the power pyramid.

There is, however, a way we can use shame as a tool of liberation. And that way is being demonstrated in the #metoo movements. Yes, plural. There are at least three: Tarana Burke’s, the more recent (more glamorous) version, and the one that is most relevant here: Unshame.

We need to help each other refuse to take on the shame of rape. A woman, a person who was raped has nothing to be ashamed of! Yet, we learn to feel that shame to hide our anger!