About
This blog contains my musing on topics from singlism and feminism to atheism and religion. Themes that are of most interest to me revolve around meaning and the difficulty we have in finding it in today’s world. Somehow this all relates. I am hoping that this blog will help me how the pieces fit together, so that I can come up with a coherent story, especially with suggestions on what we can do to save this planet.Who am I? Well, I’ve been trying to figure that out for years! And guess what, I haven’t quite found an answer but somehow I must be a human being, of the female persuasion. I grew up in Germany and after graduation high school, I came to the US with Action Reconciliation/Service for Peace. As other volunteers, I mistook this as a match-making service and got married to the guy of my dreams only to wake up in a nightmare. Before my son turned one, I left my husband. While raising my son, I got a BA, an MS, and then started working. I’ve been in the “real world” now for over 10 years, working myself through several industries in search of a job I can actually call a career. By outer standards, I am probably fairly successful but inside, I feel rather empty. Other detours - also known as intimate relationships - took me away from creating a life that I find meaningful. It wasn’t until 2007, that I decided to pursue life creation in earnest, after yet another painful relationship. I made a vow to not pursue intimate relationships, at least for a while, but instead to focus on my life. This vow is grounded in the realization that I am happier single. This is supported by the wonderful work of Bella DePaulo, Kay Trimberger, and Karen Gail Lewis who have all shown that we can be happy and single. Lewis calls remaining single just another life path, which we can choose (as opposed to the failure our society is trying to make it). So, with supportive research in hand, I decided to embrace being single (even though, it’s a little different for me since I am still a single mother). That “coming out” lay the foundation for a new, invigorated search for meaning and purpose. More on this in My Story…
At the edge of 40, I am now doing what many 20-somethings are doing: Trying to find my place in this world. I am reconnecting with many of the topics I was interested in during my late teens, which makes for wonderful conversations with my son. Along my current path, I bring many sacred cows to their retirement pastures, questioning everything critically and leaving belief systems behind. It is very freeing and exciting although the contrast to my “day job” is becoming starker all the time.
This Website has always chronicled my journey but now that I have turned it into a blog, the updates will be more frequent. It continues to be my writing sandbox but with renewed purpose while I embrace being a writer. I will use the blog to hone my writing skills, as well as collect my ideas, for everybody to see and anybody to comment on. I hope my musings will matter to other people just as much as they matter to me.
Myra said,
February 11, 2008 at 4:48 pm
I enjoyed your musings. I hadn’t seen your website in ages! Oh, my gosh… so many topics. I so enjoyed your “About” page. And I read a bit about your review of Korten’s book. Your conclusion matches mine, but yours is more corageous. I’ve heard people I respect, such as Joanna Macy and others, that we are at a breakthrough point of evolution. I concluded, “Gosh, what am I not seeing?! Those visionary people have something I don’t have.” After reading your comment, I’m wondering about their views. Although, to be honest, I don’t want to give up hope. AND, I still doubt my perception. Oh, well. How did you turn into a blog? Do people write to you, then, who read your website? How do people hear about your website, I’m curious? Many hugs, Myra
tony wilkinson said,
February 29, 2008 at 7:50 am
I stumbled in here (almost) by accident trying to find a particular review of my own book. I like your site very much and there are some very useful resources. I hesitate to urge you to read my book because you seem to have more than enough to read (!) but if you are ever interested in an English perspective (not that I claim to represent the whole country) on the idea of secular spirituality and happiness it’s “the lost art of being happy - spirituality for sceptics”. (Our spelling is variant over here.) Like you I have been intrigued by Buddhism but suspicious of aspects of its religiosity. I think it’s possible to define a genuinely secular sense of spirituality in the sense of spiritual practice, motivated by the desire to live happily rather than anything supernatural.
Good luck and very best wishes
Tony Wilkinson
Rachel said,
February 29, 2008 at 2:21 pm
Tony: I’ll check out your book! It sounds interesting! I have to admit that I am not convinced that we even need spirituality. On the other hand, when I am in awe of nature some people might consider that spirituality. And I think, we might need something to ground us and a secular spirituality might just be it.